Blog
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Obama: "Start by Listening"
President Barack Obama sent his new Middle-East envoy former-Sen. George Mitchell off to the region last night with one clear directive: "Start by listening." It's good advice not only for Mitchell, but all of us. But what does it mean?
Obama made his comments in his first formal interview after being sworn in as president. The interview was with Dubai-based Al-Arabiya network, where he said,"What I told (Sen. Mitchell) is start by listening, because all too often the United States starts by dictating."
We all dictate to others, and too much. Too often our impulse is to get out in front of problems, opportunities, and daily hiccups, by attempting to demonstrate our "strong leadership," our vigorous approach, and our expertise. We may think we're listening, but are we?
Sometimes when we're pushed up against the wall, we'll declare, "We need to listen more." But what do we do then? Here are phrases you hear, and what they seem to mean in practice:• "Listen up" -- an admonition for others to listen to us;• "We’re listening" -- usually code words for a group or individual to position
themselves in your eyes (think: a television station saying "We're listening" or a related phrase, "We're on your side!");
• "Listening tour" -- a series of conversations that often end up being "tell and sell" sessions by the sponsoring group, with very little listening ever occurring;
• "Listen to me" -- translated as, I really want you to listen to what I have to say, then maybe I'll listen to you;
• "I'm all ears" -- sure, until you get your first sentence out and then, "Well, let me tell you what I think."
What's needed is that we actually listen. But sometimes we fail to listen at all, as Obama suggested. Then, there are times when we think we're listening, but are we? For instance, do we know:• What people are really trying to tell us, even if they cannot find a way to clearly articulate it?
• What is most valuable to people in their lives, on a particular issue, or about their community?
• How people are defining their concerns -- what web of concerns is at work, and how do the different strands connect to each other?
• What emotions are really at work, and what do they tell us?
The Obama directive should be our directive. To create conditions for hope and change in communities will take each of us being open to see and hear others; to be willing to know their pain; to understanding reality in a way that is different from our own take.
Of course, listening alone won’t lead us to the solutions that we must create and implement. But the truth is that without stepping forward to listen, we are likely to remain stuck and stymied and enjoy only fleeting success. The key to unlock here is our own intention and purpose: do we genuinely want to hear others, and are we willing to meet them where they are?
I'll be listening to hear your own thoughts. -
My Prayer for Barack Obama
This time next Tuesday, Barack Obama will be our 44th president. As we approach his inauguration, I offer these simple words as a prayer for our next president. My hope is that you'll add your own words.My Prayer for Barack Obama
I pray that you always remember that you are now part of an enduring axis of hope -- tracing from Lincoln to Roosevelt to MLK -- and that we can leave behind the empty rhetoric of recent years.
I pray that you are bold enough to scale the mountain of challenges before us, even as you remember that the years of mistrust and blame run deep, and can only be washed away over time with sound deeds.
I pray that "We, The People" give you the benefit of the doubt when you err and stumble, because you will and we must.
I pray that you remember on your worst day what you said on your best: there is a difference between false hope and authentic hope, and only one is worth fighting for.
I pray that you challenge us to become part of rebuilding our nation, our neighborhoods, our bonds to one another, because this task is fundamentally the work of the people.
I pray that on the historic day when the first African-American man takes the solemn oath of office, that each of us steps forward and makes the solemn commitment to fight hatred, bigotry and prejudice wherever we find it in our midst.
I pray that we realize that you have already served an important purpose, helping all of us recognize what we already knew in our hearts: we must turn away from the ugly politics that too often brought out the worst in us.
I pray that as we welcome you as our next president, we (and you) remember that change often starts at home, in our neighborhood, among us - and that no president alone can fulfill this role.
Now, I pray that you and we Turn ... Turn toward our communities... Turn toward one another.
Yes, now is the time for us to Turn.
Please add your thoughts in the comments.
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Hyundai's New Social Contract
Over the holiday break I saw this incredible -- well, truly unbelievable -- ad for Hyundai cars: If you experience involuntary loss of income, you can return your new car. Hyundai's move, I believe, represents the early signs of emergence of a new social contract in America. That's good news. Now, Detroit, where are you?
Hyundai's tagline is, "We're all in this together and we'll get through it together." Your first reaction to this ad might be, "Right, show me the money!" Too many times companies try to snooker people with their slick commercials, and then add the fast-talking voice over at the end who reels off all the product’s restrictions and possible side effects.
But Hyundai puts their money where their mouth is. If you experience involuntary job loss, a physical disability, job transfer or other life-changing event within the first year of your purchase, Hyundai will take back your car. You can read the details at Hyundaiusa.com, and even I could understand them.
Sure, Hyundai wants to sell cars; after all, that's their business. But this approach goes well beyond business as usual. They clearly acknowledge in their ads the economic anxiety people are feeling these days. They get it. But they've gone well beyond listening well. They've imagined a new relationship with their customers. In doing so, they've outlined a new social contract which says "We are in this together," and where both parties make genuine commitments to one another.
When I think about Hyundai's move, I can't help but wonder about the bailout of the American auto companies. After receiving billions of dollars in assistance late last year, their response was to take out full page ads in major national newspapers to thank the American public for supporting them. Yes, ostensibly, they used the money we gave to them to thank us for helping them. I know such ads are the norms for these situations.
But where the hell is Detroit's vision for their future. Instead of the typical ads, why, after receiving all these U.S. tax dollars, didn't the heads of the big three automakers step up and say, "Thanks, and this is where we're headed." If they want such a close relationship with the American public, why didn't they propose, like Hyundai, a new relationship that would win back people's confidence? Why haven't they tried to change the very rules of their sector, as opposed to pursuing business as usual?
What Hyundai is doing is remaking the rules of game. That's welcomed news. It makes me feel like folks in their company really are listening to the American people, and that they want to be a part of our recovery as well as their own.
I remember when Hyundai first came to the U.S. and it was hard to pronounce their name. My wife and I would often laugh at our inept attempts. But look how far they have come. Detroit, I can only hope that you're not too far behind. The goal can't be simply to save your company; it's to help build a new social contract. Then, maybe people will see you as relevant.